Shooting Stars
by Lady Absolute
Summary: Bluestar is sitting up on Highrock just staring at the stars and wishing that her life wasn't so.


**Shooting Stars**

Sitting up on Highrock, she listened to her clanmates soft breathes, the occasionally mew or scrunch of moss as a cat turned over in its sleep.

If only she could join them, in the warm, yet dark embrace that sleep brought.

There was a loud meow on a breeze that tugged at her gray fur, her head turned from their endless stare towards the stars to the Apprentice's Den.

Even with clouds covering the half moon, she could make out the bright pelt of her apprentice.

Dreaming of hunts and battles to come, he was sleeping soundly with his denmates.

She sighed, just a restless apprentice, her head turned back towards the night sky.

Moonlight fought its way through a gap between the clouds and lit up her her fur, turning it blue.

Her eyes lit up in the night.

They caught all of the many stars in their beautiful blue gaze.

In the stars she could imagine all those who had gone in her life.

Just as her mother had once told her she would be able to.

She could see the beautiful arch of her mother ears and the outline of her sister's pretty robin egg blue eyes.

Not that she had ever been able to compare the two.

The only robin's eggs she had ever seen had been broken and the unborn birds were in the stomach of a fox.

And there!

She could make the head of her beloved, his broad shoulders, that cocky grin of his.

And circling around his paws, yes, there was their kit.

Death had taken her before she was even six moons.

The kit's aunt had taken care of her and would continue to until she, as the kit's mother, came to join them.

She jerked her head back as a cat's deep _grrrooowlll_ shocked her out of her thoughts.

Having no need to turn her head towards the noise. It was only Tigerclaw as always.

Dreaming of endless battles where his long claws ripped into his enemies.

The gray cat sighed. There was no point in participating in this nightly ritual.

She had begun to lie awake on Highrock, looking at the stars, since his death.

Her noble Oakheart had killed Redtail in battle and Tigerclaw had avenged his fallen deputy.

Or so the brown tabby had said.

She had not trusted Tigerclaw since his aprenticeship with Thistleclaw.

Thistleclaw.

The point where all had crumbled down around her.

Falling for a Riverclanner, Snowfur's death, the death of poor, _poor_ Mosskit. Leaving the surviving kits with their father.

Nothing was right her life anymore.

She was alone.

Absolutely alone.

Not even Whitestorm could fill up that hole in her heart.

No one could fill the void the deaths of all the ones she had loved had created.

She looked up from where her gaze had fallen to a paw just barely poking out of the Nursery.

There was a gleam in the sky.

The stars, they were falling.

As if to say that she was not alone in her grief, the stars making up her loved ones melted away and joined the stars in their race to touch the earth that waited below.

Always out of reach as they sat up in their high up perches.

But they never once reached her.

The energy that had begun their descent died out.

But the image of their rush to come to her stayed in her mind.

And with them, a faint memory from when she was but a kit.

She could remember the slender gray tail wrapping around her as her mother settled down in their nest.

Snowfur had been playing outside but she, Bluestar, had chosen to listen to her mother's story.

"The stars," The queen had mewed to her kit, "are just the warriors of Starclan. And once in while, when a cat has suffered but has achieved greatness despite her loss. They come to share the grief of their descendant. If you should ever be lucky enough to see one these star storms, then I will be both happy and sad for you. Sad because of the grief you would have gone through. Happy because when the stars fall, you can make a wish. Any wish at all. Now go on, I'm not a storyteller. Play outside with Snowkit."

And she had rushed out to play with her sister.

The tale forgotten and pushed to the back of her mind.

Dismissed as a silly tale for kits.

Until now.

Recalling her mother's silky words. She bent her head to her chest and began to wish.

_I wish, for not happiness, but for a world where my sacrifices would never had been made._

_Oh please, will you give that one wish?_

With a quick intake of breath, she stood up on all four paws, joints creaking in protest.

She leaped down from her perch just as the stars had done minutes ago, and into the shadows of Highrock.

The blue gleam left her fur and became gray, her eyes darkened and her mind pushed the tale to the back of her head once more.

Stars could not give out wishes.

No matter how much she wishes they would.


End file.
